“It’s amazing what you can accomplish when you do not care who gets the credit.”
~ Harry S. Truman
I would first like to say my mom did one hell of a job raising me. Sure there were some special teachable moments along the way, but what I appreciate the most is the fact that she was there. No matter how messy it got, she just showed up. She still does.
More so these days, I hear from people (usually after I have shared an accomplishment of mine), “Your mom did a wonderful job with you!”
My first thought is usually, “Duh, she sure did. She did the best she could and lucky me, that was more than enough.”
Then, being the thinker I am, I’m like, “Hmmm, I’ve been out of my mom’s house for over 22 years.” There is a LOT of life that I had to figure out on my own.” Not to take anything away from my mom because again, she did a great job for the time I was under her roof. And I am always grateful for the advice she still gives me from time to time. Since I’ve left my mother’s house however, there have been many key players who have helped me along the way.
On the flip side, many people tell my kids that their dad has also done a great job with them. I always appreciate the kind words because I know it comes from a place of love, but something about these comments rattle me a bit.
You see, like my mom, I’m doing the best I can and I can only hope it is more than enough to launch them successfully into the world. Not to downplay my involvement as a parent, but like my mom again, I just show up.
Not to mention, they have a mom, though she may not physically be in their lives as much as I, who also shows up and does the best she can. I definitely have to give a shout out to the step-parents, the grandparents, the teachers and the friends who all seem to show up for my kids. Shit, for all kids out there.
I guess what I’m getting at is I don’t want full credit for something I’m not doing on my own. I don’t want full credit for all the amazing things my kids are doing now and will do in the future. Just like I don’t want to be totally blamed for all the jacked up choices they will make either.
I see a lot of parents out there trying to take full credit for the good and none of the blame when the shit rolls down hill. Let your kids shine! They are divine. They might have got here through us, but they are not just for us. We must share their AWESOMENESS (I love this word) with the world.
Our kids are going to grow the hell up! And a lot of it they are going to do without us. Let that sink in. Let’s give them credit for showing up for themselves every damn day for the rest of their lives. Now THAT deserves some serious credit.
Shout out to all the folks who may have had a rough upbringing, but didn’t let that define them. Survival and success over playing victim baby!